Well Christmas 2010 is over. Are presents put away? The tree down? Clothes washed and folded from the trip? No. 'No' is the answer to every question. I have slept in this morning, run errands, and started The Girl Who Played With Fire by Stieg Larsson. And Coda has slept all day. It's been beautiful. Christmas was small numbers this year. Just me, Mom and Bobbert. I headed out to Albuquerque and had a great time talking, shopping, and skiing Sandia! Mom and I had a blast. And Bob? Well he got sick. So he was out. Then he went to Minnesota. So he was still out. Boooo! Thankfully everyone has returned home safely and healthily! A couple of pics for you... I took very few, so sorry. ;)
I finally ousted the begonia vine, empty boxes, and roman column that have been taking up precious space in my home. And I discovered something after putting up only a few things back on top of the bookshelf. It looks great in here without so much STUFF. How do you accumulate so many things throughout a lifetime? And mine's not even 30 years old! There are boxes I have that I haven't opened in YEARS. And I can't bring myself to just toss them. Some have horses I played with as a child. I want them for my future children. Some have books I have read - or haven't yet. Will I ever read them again, or for that matter, at all if I haven't yet? WHY do I feel the need to keep so many things that are not needed? A reminder of my past? REALLY??? I feel like things are so much better now than they have ever been - why hold onto so much? So I'm going to simplify. If something tugs at my heart, I'll keep it. But if I don't even remember it to begin with? It's gone. This is my goal. To simplify. To minimize. To reduce my stress and calm my soul in a home I can relax in and love to be in. To reduce my material possessions in an effort to accomplish this goal.
And then I won't have so much stuff to pack the next time I move. =)
From my last post, and from those of you who have been in contact with me the past week and a half, you might think, 'Ummm... that's not what you've been saying'. And you're right. I've had a tough time looking on the bright side lately. But today was a wake-up call to all the good and positive things I have going in my life. So let's review THOSE and not the other things. :)
*I have wonderful parents. They check in on me, offer support, love me, know what to say and when, and all in all, are there for me. WhenEVER I need them. They provide a loving atmosphere in which I get to learn, explore, and be ME. And that's tough for me. Being ME hasn't always been easy. And while I've been able to do a much better job of it the past few years, it's still a struggle. But not around them.
*I have fabulous sisters. Growing up, living with a family of girls was difficult. Because we weren't the same. In almost every way we were different from one another, and that was tough. I think I basically lived my secondary years at school partially to avoid conflict with them. I'm not good with it. And they are. Not in a bad way, they have always been much more comfortable and confident in their opinions and beliefs, and I envy that. But now that we're grown, I try to NOT avoid it. Their opinions are so valuable to me, and I LOVE that we are different. I enjoy telling people how my "blended" family doesn't feel "blended" and how the 4 of us are so very different, and yet still try to remain close. While we may not be as close to one another as we would like, I know they've got my back. And I've got theirs. They expand my knowledge and open my eyes to things I would otherwise have missed.
*My friends are... there for me. I'm sure some of you have known what it's like to feel like you are the outsider in a group. I know I have. A lot. But I don't now. I know my group(s) of friends are there when I need them and I can count on them. This was my wake-up call today. I listened to a voice message today telling me that if I needed anything I could call on her and that I was loved. And I could tell her the same thing. And others. In multiple areas of my life. How awesome is it to know that no matter where I turn, I have friends who will be there for me and tell it to me like it is - difficult or not.
*My school is the BEAST. Friendships from the previous paragraph were formed here. And where most schools divide into cliques like the students we teach, ours is a family. Sure, we have out groups, but there isn't one person in that building I would go talk to or just stop in to say hello. Oh yeah, and they've totally helped me build my program. Almost 170 kiddos at last count for this upcoming year!!!
*St. B's is a great church home. And I know they'll probably rope me into it again for saying this, but VBS did wonders for getting to know people OUTSIDE of the church choir and their families. It was awesome to make so many new connections.
*I have a great home. Really thankful for the location and place itself.
*My dog rocks. I know this goes without saying, but I really do think I have a great dog in Coda. She's just a GOOD DOG. I couldn't ask for a better doggy companion. Especially after she's put up with me being sick on the couch for over a week. We were finally able to play a little in the empty lot nearby tonight. And then we had to stop when she took off after a little chihuahua mix. :/
So life is good. There are stumbling blocks and there are rough times. But you can always find something that is a positive. And more often than not, I can find more than one. So I leave you with a video my mother sent her girls. It pretty much sums it up.
This is my venting. The urge just sort of hit me, and it's actually kind of nice to put it out in the open. Don't read it if you don't want to. It's more for me to get out than anything else.
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I feel like I've been taken advantage of. From all aspects of this stupid car wreck (the other car? UNINSURED.) including the rental company, body shop, the OTHER insurance company (which isn't going to matter here)... the only good thing? MY insurance company is doing its job. Thank goodness. But really?? Everyone else?? I JUST WANT IT FIXED.
My old apartment complex. You want me to pay for new carpet? I lived there 6 months, and gave you a deposit as well as a pet deposit. I don't think I owe you anything. So you're next on my list to take down.
My ex. Without going into all the embarrassingly agonizing details, I wish the lightbulb would have gone on sooner in my brain. So now I'll be that much MORE skeptical of someone I might possibly have a relation with. Because he's still messing with my - we'll keep this family friendly - stuff.
And me? I'm compliant. Too much so. I know this, have known it, and probably will struggle with it my entire life. I have a feeling this next year I'm really going to have to stand up for myself and what I need. It's going to be a rude awakening. Professionally and personally.
So I'm going to PK tomorrow afternoon to enjoy my aunts and my mother. Thank goodness for amazing women in my life who I can look to and find support in. That includes my sisters and my friends. Because Lord knows where I'd be without them! Probably not in as good a place as I am.
I am constantly amazed at the number of natural elements I find living in the city rather than the suburbs. Sure, you have your normal squirrels, chipmunks (or ground squirrels), grackles, pigeons, etc. But now that I live IN Dallas, I have seen more wildlife and a vast array of trees and plantlife. From the opposums to the snails (big as I've ever seen!) to the variety of mushrooms - ones that look like parasols, neon green, even one that I thought was a white rock until I realized Coda was sniffing it and it was a fungus. I am constantly amazed. There are more birds here than the suburbs. More cardinals, more blue jays, more robins... And more trees! No one is plowing up vast acres of land to plant the same tree 50 times and say it's a "wooded" lot! There are vines everywhere. Flowers along the roadside and the residents take great pride in their landscaping. Mostly. I am more drawn to walk around and take in everything here than I was living in Grapevine, Irving, Frisco... all the suburbs just don't seem to offer the same unique, and yet familiar, landscape I enjoy. Kudos to the people here for bringing and maintaining the natural landscape you wouldn't think to find in Big D.
I am ready to be in Colorado with my family. I'm on break, right? I STILL feel like I have ALL THIS STUFF to do! Colorado means I can relax and enjoy my siblings, my niece, my parents, and all the activities or non-activities I wish!
An update! I've moved to Oak Lawn! It's a community in Dallas, just north of Uptown. LOVE IT. The people are friendly, the area is green, and I have easy access to highways, food, and friends. The latter two are extremely important. :)
So I will post pics of the new place soon. Right now I just can't find my camera from the move. But if I put off posting any longer, you'll all have thought I'd disappeared off the planet!
Other exciting things? My choir program is growing like crazy next year! I have 79 students currently. Or did before school let out. Next year? 180!!! How crazy is that?!?!? I am really looking forward to finally teaching Choir, and only Choir! I will miss the time with the administrators at lunch duty, and the hecticness that is Yearbook, but CHOIR! This is what I'm SUPPOSED to teach! So I'm happy!
ANOTHER exciting thing? I get to go on vacation with my family in a few weeks! Time to enjoy horseback riding, hiking, and the mountains of Colorado. I am REALLY looking forward to seeing my sisters, my parents, and my NIECE. Love that cutie pie!
So as soon as I get pictures uploaded, you can see the new place for yourselves. It's very, "Kate". :)
So many of you have asked about our "new" place. We've been moved in since the end of December, but FINALLY have it mostly organized! Takes us awhile, but we get 'r done! Here are is a before and after of the living room.
BEFORE
AFTER
If you want to see the place in its (almost) entirety, click here to see the Picasa album.
So you know how I can never quite hear you the first time you say something to me? How I ask you to repeat things? How it seems like I turn the radio or tv up or I talk to loudly? It's because I have hearing loss. It's proven now, folks! I went in for the appointment. Apparently though, it's correctable! It's either one of two things. 1: I have a buildup of negative pressure in my middle ear cause by an inflamed or blocked eustation tube or 2: the bones in my middle ear are stiff. How do we figure out which it is? By cutting a hole in my ear drum and placing a tube in there to equalize the pressure in my ear and allowing the eustation tube to go back to normal. If that works, then we know it's not the bones. If it doesn't work, then it's time for surgery to loosen the bones in my ear so they vibrate correctly.
See?
Good times, eh? Prayers would be appreciated. I'm a little nervous, being that music is such an integral part of my life, that there will soon be a hole in my ear drum. But I'd rather fix this now than wait for it to get worse. Right? Right? I can't hear you.
