Smash In

I can't call it a break in. To me that implies something broke. And when something breaks, you can either fix it, or it's easily replaced. Nothing about someone smashing my car window and ripping out my stereo (yes Heidi, the one from 4-5 years ago that our parents got us for Xmas for our "new" cars) was easy. That was 2 nights ago and I STILL don't have the glass vacuumed up yet. New window? Great. An auto glass company came out to my school to replace it for me, but we couldn't find an accessible outlet on the outside of the bldg. for him to plug in his portable vacuum to clean my car. And since it was pouring rain yesterday, extension cords were out of the question. That's right. I come out to go to school and think 'What is all over my passenger seat?... SHIT'. That's pretty much the thought process I had Wednesday morning. Then I called the police, the apt. complex, and school to get a sub for the morning while I spent the AM attempting to get someone to replace my window in the rain so I could drive without the hazard lights and go more than 20 MPH trying to hold a tarp in the car while keeping the rain out.

Aside: Anyone notice that I'm pissed? And depressed. Seriously. I do not understand. I don't get it and while I know there are stupid bastards out there that go and do these things (especially at the holidays according to my SRO), I DO NOT GET IT. I don't want to, honestly. What mostly bothers me is why I feel so sad about it. I'm Okay. Coda's Okay. No one is hurt. They didn't steal the valuable items, even though they defaced my car. My apartment in intact and nothing lost there. I do not like this feeling though.

Friends have told me they got upset because of a sense of loss and violation. I don't know if that's it with me. It doesn't help that my students have had performances out their wazoos this week. Field-trip Tuesday with 3 performance stops. Pep Rally performance today (that I ended up in as one of my kiddos is out sick), and 2 more gigs tomorrow, including our Winter Concert. And our fundraiser products showed up yesterday. And I had to find someone for my car. And I can't stop crying about it! Dammit!

I do count the blessings. I do look at the bright things. I do appreciate the things that ARE Okay... and better than Okay.

I do not like idiots who feel the need to gain from causing others loss.

My calendar seems to get more and more filled up as December is continuing. Scary, but true. Holiday season = performances. The more the merrier! Right? Riiiiight. At least I'm enjoying it as are my students.

What am I really looking forward to though? Albuquerque with the family. About a week just hanging out and enjoying the company of my sisters and parents! It feels like it's been forever! The fam is going to be a welcome relief and time of enjoyment!

So what's been going on with me? Kyle's in Colorado now, I'm with Coda (yay for my puppy!), and I'm making friends! Who-hoo! Come by any time. Coda needs help getting a start on a big bone I got her. AWESOME.

This was random, and I hope you enjoyed.

Solo & Ensemble

While teachers have to spend lots of time working for their students outside of the "regular" workday, it does have it's rewards.

23 out of 24 of my students who competed in Solo & Ensemble Saturday received the highest rating of a 1. Aka Superior. Who-hoo!

Celebration aside, how difficult is it to tell the one student who got a 2 that they're the only one??? Not that you say that, but it's rather obvious. Granted, she skipped a line in her song (I was accompanying - freaky on more than one level) and I understand the judges scores. I have no argument, I just feel bad that she's IT.

Otherwise, I'm still thrilled about my other students! They excelled in every way that day, and I'm proud of them! So here's to my Broncos!

Tiger in the Complex

I pet a tiger. A real, live, 6 week old tiger in my apartment complex. This guy's son and daughter-in-law rehabilitate exotic baby animals, and he was watching their 6-week old siberian tiger. I got pictures and will post them as soon as I get them off the camera. She made a chucking noise, which was her "purring", and she was roaring! I can't wait to show you from the pictures!

OK. That's all. =)

Halloween

Encore! Team ladies dressed up as villains from Disney.



The Wicked Queen from Snow White, Cruella DeVil, and Maleficent from Sleeping Beauty.

Scary, aren't we???

The Mary Kay Culture

I learned a lot this weekend. I had the opportunity to fly out to Las Vegas (1st time there!) on Thursday and learn from the best in our area. The Shealy Area Advance was fantastic. I was concerned about an hour before it ended though. Everyone there kept emphasizing the feeling that Mary Kay has to have IN you for you to be in it. That you had to have a purpose for your business. I hadn't caught that bug yet. While our National was speaking to us though I figured it out.

I want to teach.

No, this does not mean that I am leaving Mary Kay or leaving my middle school (yet). I saw the women onstage this weekend and admired their enthusiasm, presence, and FUN attitudes! I felt like I was surrounded by women LIKE ME. Crazy, beautiful women who want to be the best they can be as they are - and they'll make up dances and skits and songs to perform for the rest of us just for entertainment. Do you know how badly I wanted to join in the "Dreamgirls" dance for the MK Husbands last night at the banquet??? It involved boas!!! Here are women who GET ME. Who want to be in the spotlight, but who don't focus on themselves to get there, they focus on OTHERS.

So the teaching thing.

I want to be one of the women who stand up and inspire others. I want to be there helping other women realize their potential. I want women to love themselves and to know that THEY ARE ENOUGH. What better way to do that than through lipsticks? =) I should say what more FUN way to do that than through lipsticks???

Don't freak. I'm not in a cult. I'm now part of a culture. And I'm excited.

It's Official

It's official. I'm divorced. Crazy, isn't it? And although I've been separated for so long, now that everything is signed it's almost more difficult. Maybe it's getting used to not having to struggle. Maybe it's that something that's been a part of my life for so long is gone. It's sad. It's frustrating. It's happy. It's exciting. And all of these emotions wrap themselves around me and leave me gasping at times as I'm not sure what emotion I'm feeling or when. So I keep doing what I've been doing... move forward.

School is going well. I'm really enjoying this year and my students, though frustrating at times, are really great kids. My peers are awesome not only as teachers but also as friends. My administration is a great leadership board who care about the KIDS and their TEACHERS. While that includes test scores, it's not all about test scores.

Mary Kay is going to pick up. I'm going to make it pick up. I'm ready to see some positive things come from this company for me, and I'm going to make that happen. Need a makeover? Facial? New products? I'm your gal.

So here I am. Officially single again and honestly happy about it. It's not easy, but it's getting better all the time. Yay for the Beatles. =)

On a Roll!

So there are 2 major events this week. Number 1, the first official concert of the year is Thursday! Can't wait - the students are going to sound great! Number 2, on Friday I get divorced OFFICIALLY. Hallelujah and Amen to THAT! It's been a long road. Haven't enjoyed it one bit. Now I get to move on. I'm totally going out Friday night. Any takers???

1 Signature Away

All the paperwork has been filled out and signed. I simply have to go get a few things from the house, then go to the Courthouse and have a judge sign off on it all. Planning that for next Friday. It was an EXHAUSTING day yesterday. My soon-to-be-ex was as unreasonable and inconsiderate as he usually is. And I am almost done. The light is blinding. I just need to jump into it. Thank you for the prayers yesterady - I know I was surrounded by good thoughts and prayers all afternoon/evening (7 hours, folks).

So yeah. 1 signature left. Amen to that.

Blabbing/Venting

So I know there are a lot of things happening for me this week. However, I'd really like it if I could take the "handle it as it comes" approach. I can't do anything about my mediation that's scheduled for Tuesday until, duh, Tuesday. I can't figure out a piano accompaniment for a last-minute gig scheduled for Thursday until tomorrow. I can't get the knots out of my shoulders and back until I can actually relax and get someone to help me with that (Saturday or Monday, Lisa will call me back). And I can't get my mind to calm down, relax, enjoy what I can right now, focus on some other things that need done, and calm my stomach until.... ??? It's all over? School doesn't really bother me. I know I'll find a solution for that tomorrow. Not a problem. Tuesday bothers me. That I'm unsure about the outcome. That I don't want to go to trial. That I can't afford shit right now because I have to put pennies away for my lawyer, ESPECIALLY if we're going to trial. And mostly that I'm this upset about something that I don't want to be. I'm trying very hard to distract myself from it, and it keeps gnawing away at me, expressing itself when I think I have some sort of control over it.

I know, Mom. He's controlling me again because I can't get my own emotions under control. I'm still pissed about DAD. How do you stop letting something erode away in you when there seems to be no closure? How do you bring closure to something that will probably never be closed? I don't have the time or the funds to take a year to find happiness for myself, like Elizabeth Gilbert in "Eat, Pray, Love". Great book, by the way. It gives me hope that I will be able to provide myself with some kind calm and, for lack of a better word, closure at some point in my life. I know I can be very patient, but lately that has not been a great talent of mine. I feel like I've been patient long enough.

Well that sounds familiar. I think I heard myself say that several times to myself a couple of years ago. Most memorably around July of 2006.

So that leaves me with what? Plans of action. I know dates, times, and hopefully that means that in less than 20 days I will officially be known by my maiden name again. I'll try to focus on that fact (hopefully fact). So take Coda out. See friends. Enjoy company and try to distract my brain for the next 45 hours.

Someone call me and remind me to cry Monday night. I don't want to burst into tears on Tuesday (which is likely). We all know how much I love conflict.

Lazy Dog

So the Gabriel/Gehrman family has begun a fitness challenge to last up to Christmas. Walk/Jog (or bike or play tennis at the equivalent) 7 miles each week. So long as you complete that weekly, you win! I love it. I get to take Coda out and... well... drag her up the last hill every time we do a certain route because she is apparently not capable of withstanding the Texas heat AND walking 3 miles. I'm going to have to start walking with her every other day and going on my own to get my heartrate up for the required amount of time. I want to lose 10 lbs. by Xmas. How do you get the dog to keep up with you??? She's a young'un! Just over a year with GREYHOUND in her blood! Crazy mutt. Love her though! She keeps me entertained. =)

Mediation

October 2nd at 1:00 PM. If that doesn't end it, the trial date is October 15th. Pray for the former to be successful.

Labor Day

How much do I love my family??? A whole heck of a lot! The Orenders invited me out to their lake home in Possum Kingdom for Labor Day weekend. I read more in 2 days then I had been able to read in 3 weeks. We swam, boated, jet skiied, and RELAXED! Oh yeah. And we ate a lot, too. =) Thanks to Carol and Bill for inviting me, and it's ALWAYS fun to hang with the cousins! The babies grow up so fast!!!


Katy had her friend Kelly out from Chicago - the bunkhouse was the place to be!


Connor's already taking charge of his younger cousin, Liam.


"The Beast" kills your thighs. Can I get a witness, Katy and Kelly???


Father and son are WAY TOO CUTE.


The Girls at the Lake House!

It has to be said again... I love my family!

PS: More pictures are on my Facebook site... go here - http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=723290963

Collin County Courthouse

I missed the 4th day of school today for a 30 minute stint in Collin County's newest courthouse up in McKinney. While I am content and, I can't think of a good word... satisfied? We'll go with it. Satisfied that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, I am perturbed that this light hasn't blinded me yet. WHY is there so much conflict over reason? WHY is there NO conflict when reason is trying to be had??? There isn't any because it becomes a one-sided argument. Not even that. A one-sided attempt at discussion. I feel as though this thing that has been haunting me is STILL THERE. I want it gone. It should have been gone months ago, as Texas law says it can be. Folks, mediation is supposed to occur before Sept. 15th (that's what the order said, anyhow) and a trial has been set (if needed) for October 15th. Friends in the area, you can bet there will be a get-together that coming weekend. Be ready for celebration, because if it doesn't happen then, it had better have happened in September (how awesome would that be???). I already have students calling me by my maiden name. It has a wonderful ring to it.

The First Day

It's over. The first day of school is FINISHED! Amen to that. I have some very sweet 6th graders, awesome 8th graders, and TALKATIVE 7th graders. And my boy's choir? 19 males and hopefully still counting. I am PUMPED UP for this year! We have some awesome things planned, and if all goes as well as we're planning them we are going to have a blast of a year. 1st place ratings, here we come! Just thought you'd all like to know how the first day went. We sing and move my furniture tomorrow. =)

Rimelspach-Gupta Wedding

I know you are all interested in hearing about my friend's wedding, so here you go! Jennifer's wedding was AMAZING! I strongly suggest attending a Hindu ceremony at some point in your life - very beautiful and so much fun! And the Gupta's would definitely give the Lindsay's a run for their money out on the dance floor! Below are some pics, and more are on my Facebook page.


Jennifer and Pankaj are so beautiful together!


Seriously, Jennifer was adorned head to toe in her wedding lenga. GORGEOUS.


Pankaj rode on this fine stead for the processional while we danced in front of him with the musicians around the temple.


Speaking of dancing... =)


Jennifer and Pankaj recessing after the enchange of rings. Absolutely an amazing wedding.

Post-Op

So. I had my splints and stitch (that's right, 1 stitch) removed out of my nose today. Splints? OK. Sore to get out (they're about 1/2 in. tall and 2-3 in. long), but a relief. Stitch? I cried. I cried and I needed a couple of minutes before they took out the splints. That front part inside your nose is SENSITIVE! Mom says I need to learn more breathing techniques.

But they're out! And I can already feel a difference. YIPPEE! So thanks for the prayers and thoughts and well-wishes (and putting up with my drug-induced poetry, if you can call it poetry). Next week they finish cleaning out my sinuses and I'll be done! I'm very glad to be in the upside of recovery now. Puking and oozing (that's for you, Stacy) in Erin's bedroom was not the highlight of my stay at the Orenders. Seeing Erin bring me a cheeseburger when I could handle it WAS! And the toy? I'm playing with it, don't you worry, Erin! =)

I'll update you with more later! Ciao!

Ode to My Nose

Oh, thou great and amazing organ-thingy!
You that causes me to smell the sweet scents of roses, lilacs, and Coda's breath!
You that have caused me so much congestion and suffering (and medical bills) throughout the ages...
You are my nose!

One of the Five Senses you are truly a work of art,
And those who have studied you are awed by your amazing works.
The scents you scent,
The odors you open my eyes to,
The aromas you arouse in my brain are innumberable.

And yet you torment me, nose.

Though you are supposedly healing, I can not even smell tuna.
Though you are supposedly healing, I can not breathe through my left nostril.
Though you are supposedly healing, I am still wiping up the oozes from your olefactories.

But you ARE healing.
You ARE progressing.
You ARE becoming better, and though there is pain, it is a healing pain.

And so I ask...
Do not mock my inability to spell or use correct vocabulary words or even to create bad poetry, but rejoice with me for a better, healthier nose!

Tomorrow! Tomorrow! I'll be able to breathe...

Tomorrow! It's only a daaaaaaaaay, aaaaaaaaaaaa-waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!! Yes folks, tomorrow is the big day. Surgery on my sinuses around 7:30 AM. How pumped am I? Considering I won't be able to breathe out of my nose for a week, not sing for a few weeks, but then know what it's like to actually not have an infection all the time, PRETTY DARN PUMPED UP!

And I'll look great too, because I finally did it and got professional highlights (and lowlights!!!) in my hair. Don't worry, I will post a pic. It's HOTT.

Sorry if you don't hear from me for awhile, however I'll be hopped up on drugs. Who-hoo!

Update for Stacy

This is for you, Stacy. As I sit here in Cleveland, awaiting the arrival of my luggage from DFW (long story) I decided to check out my blog. Let's see if I can tell you what's going on here... arrived, was picked up by the groom's friend, checked into the hotel, went back to the airport to pick up more people, ate lunch, and am now waiting to head back, yet again, to the airport to see if my clothes and everything else made it on the last flight from Dallas.

Coda's great - she has surpassed the 60 lbs. mark and survived a bout with allergies and eye drops.

Kyle's getting settled into Dallas and is searching for jobs as I type. How many interviews will he have, folks? We shall see! He's working hard at it though - go Kyle go!

Alright. What's happening with ya'll?? =)